The Aftermath

It is always a pleasant feeling we would like to cherish over the past time, may be days, weeks, months or years. Not all have a feel good memory over the past. Some still haunts us while some vanishes as time flies by. After spending more than a couple of years in an alien country(not really though now!) like Australia I could very well feel time has changed my nature, attitude and my thoughts. Living alone away from our dear family has made us lead a life all together. Things that I have learnt here is plenty apart from my university studies. Have never ever spent money so conditionally ever before. Learnt the true value of money here. Many of my friends who have started earning their first penny feel happy managing their own living. At times back at home in India, I have wondered why dad and mum object me in talking in phone with my friends for hours. The same which I followed here cost me money which I had to earn all by myself. Some time I can help feeling proud of earning while I study which I had never done in India.

One thing my friends here and myself can boast of is by living all by ourselves.Self cooking has taught us to save money and spend it within the restricted budget which cannot be followed in India. Sometimes it is a really lazy job but most times it is fun cooking along with friends. Now we can be overlooked as modern day "Nalan". Many have turned to be excellent cooks totally part from their professional studies. A weird feeling in India which even I had when I was there was, "Foreign country is a land of oppurtunities: everything very much aristocratic: colourful ambience:most important "money trees grown in each backyard". Phew!! I tried to explain some friends and relatives that its not the reality we face here. None believe that. Even my picture sent with a scenic background or at a beach creates waves like, " Hey! look at the picture, this guy is enjoying a lot and struggles to spend his dollars, look at that...look at this".

I used to smile while I hear the comments and when shared with my friends here, it obviously erupts a guffaw. These pictures are sent to the family to make them feel happy about us and gives them some hope that we are happy. We still need to earn our bread(not just spend from the money trees from backyard).

Friends have always changed my lifestyle in all quarters of my life. I have seen people running after money and also people rushing to help their needy friends. Has the change of country corrupted the mind? Has friendly relations just an eyewash? People shed away from people as money becomes a major part of life. Each hour is considered important. I could differentiate between people here and people in India. Both being friends, I could see myself inclined to friends in India. One thing that can be fished out of controversy is EXPECTATIONS. Even I expect a lot from my friends. I feel bad if my expectations fail. Each person trying to outdo the other person inspite of being a friend. Can I call it a healthy competition in India? Yes! I can. But I can call the "J" factor here. J=Jealousy. Other one is "expect the unexpected". I am very happy and proud of my friends who are the greatest support for me. As a coin has two sides, same is with friends here. Iam always blamed for being so emotional and sensitive. But it has helped me to be a close friend to many of my friends. Its my strength as well as weakness. It has kept my relations alive till now.

This blog defintely is not a personal outburst of my feeling. Its the same for each friend living outside India. All this urges me to rush towards my dearest country. But My commitment pauses me. Still long way to just think about return. But waiting always fascinated me. It still is. One thing is sure. The world has become Survival of the Fittest. It will still be the same in the forthcoming years. Gearing up with confidence, I wish all my fellow friends to attain their dream goals.

The Art of Letting Go......

This was the best ever article I have ever read before. Please spend some time on it. You will feel relieved.

Dr. Alan Zimmerman's Comments:

Sooner or later, everyone you know will disappoint you in some way. They'll say something or fail to say something that will hurt you. And they'll do something or fail to do something that will anger you. It's inevitable.

Unfortunately, you make things worse when you stew over someone's words and deeds. When you dwell on a rude remark or an insensitive action made by another person, you're headed for deeper problems.

In fact, the more you dwell on these things, the more bitter you'll get.

You'll find your joy, peace and happiness slipping away. And you'll find your productivity slowing down as you spend more and more time thinking about the slight or telling others about it. Eventually, if you don't stop doing it, you'll even get sick.

So what should you do the next time someone betrays you?

TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR YOUR FEELINGS.

Even though the other person may be at fault, even though the other person wronged you, you are still responsible for your own feelings.

In other words, other people do not "cause" your feelings. You choose them.

For example, two different people could be told that their suggestions made at the staff meeting were "stupid and idiotic." One person may "choose" to feel so hurt that he never speaks up at any other meeting again. The other person may "choose" to feel sorry for the critic, sorry that the critic couldn't see the wisdom and necessity of her suggestions.

As long as you blame other people for your feelings, as long as you believe other people caused your feelings, you're stuck. You're a helpless victim.

But if you recognize the fact that you choose your feelings and you are responsible for your feelings, there's hope. You can take some time to think about your feelings. And you can decide what is the best thing to say or do.

Then, you've got to learn to WALK AWAY FROM DISAPPOINTMENT. It's difficult to do, but it's possible. The famous 19th century Scottish historian, Thomas Carlyle, proved that.

After working on his multi-volume set of books on "The French Revolution" for six years, Carlyle completed the manuscript and took volume one to his friend John Stuart Mill. He asked Mill to read it.

Five days later, Mill's maid accidentally threw the manuscript into the fire. In agony, Mill went to Carlyle's house to tell him that his work had been destroyed.

Carlyle did not flinch. With a smile, he said, "That's all right, Mill.These things happen. It is a part of life. I will start over. I can remember most of it, I am sure. Don't worry. It's all here in my mind. Go,my friend! Do not feel bad."As Mill left, Carlyle watched him from the window. Carlyle turned to his wife and said, "I did not want him to see how crushed I am by this misfortune."

And with a heavy sigh, he added, "Well the manuscript is gone, so I had better start writing again."Carlyle finally completed the work, which ranks as one of the great classics of all time. He had learned to walk away from his disappointment.After all, what could Carlyle have done about his burnt manuscript?

Action:Identify two people that have disappointed, hurt, or angered you. If possible, select two people towards whom you still have some bitterness.

Then ask yourself, "How does my bitterness serve me?

Am I happier holding on to it?Do I sleep better?

Is my life richer, fuller, and better because of my bitterness?"

If you find that your bitterness is hurting you, make a decision.Actually decide to let it go.Walk away from the disappointment -- which means you no longer dwell on it or talk about it.

A Sad Demise!!!

I dont watch news so often. But yesterday evening I did only to find the news of " Crocodile Hunter" Steve Irvin being killed by a stingray. He was filming for a documentary and was involved in diving off Port Douglas.The man who was a brand ambassador of Australia and known to tame the world's deadliest species was killed while on such a expedition for a documentary. He was one of the greatest personalities representing Australia. His TV show "The Crocodile Hunter" is still being aired througout the world and he has a great fan following mainly kids.

Unlike other adventurers, Steve was a man in tune always with the dangerous environment. He tamed venomous snakes and Crocs as mere cats and dogs. Many objected his celebrity status for publicity stunt. But he went on to start a Zoo employing more than 500 people. He is survived by his wife and two children. He championed environmental projects like, "Steve Irvin Conservation Foundation" and "International Crocodile Rescue". His death news created ripples throughout the world. May this daring guy's soul Rest In Peace.